You'd think that selecting the members of your wedding party would be the easiest, most enjoyable part of planning a wedding. For us, it was an incredibly agonizing decision.

It would be easy as pie to choose about 50 people to stand by our side as we get married. However, we decided very early on that we wanted to make our wedding ceremony as simple and dignified as possible. (We reasoned that doing so would have some side benefits, too: First, it would shorten the length of time Teresa and I have to stand up on stage trembling. Also, it might help keep expenses down to something less than a million dollars.) So, we chose to keep things simple as possible - just four other people up on stage during the ceremony. We'd select a Maid of Honor, a Flower Girl, a Best Man, and a Ring Bearer.

First, there was the choice of a Maid of Honor. Normally, this is a pretty easy decision: the bride just picks her best friend. Trouble is, Teresa has two best friends: Jennifer Comer and Nita Richter.

Teresa and Jennifer have been friends since high school. They've seen each other though good times and bad. As young, single moms, they were roommates. Teresa, having neither a car or driver's license, depended on Jennifer for transportation anywhere she went. They shared expenses when there was barely enough money for groceries. They've partied together, and cried together. To this day, christmas would not be complete without a trip to the Comer's house. Jennifer has been by Teresa's side for over a quarter century - never judging, and always supportive.

Then there's Nita. Just saying "Nita" brings a smile to Teresa's face. For over a decade, from North Carolina, to Key West, to the Caribbean, this inseperable pair has been known far and wide as "The Fun Girls". Teresa even flew out to Las Vegas to serve as Maid of Honor/Best (wo)Man at Nita's wedding. Now, when these two first met, they seemed so different that I felt sure they'd never be able to get along. I was dead wrong. As different as they may seem on the surface, deep down, I think they're operating on the exact same wavelength. You could lock these two up in a totally empty room, and I feel sure they'd be able to keep each other entertained for months. Many a time Nita's husband Tom and I have just stood back and watched in amazement at these two dear friends laughing and talking together.

On top of the impossible task of chosing a Maid of Honor, Teresa had one other important thing to consider: She really needed someone to act as a sort of wedding day manager. Our wedding day is going to be terrifying enough for Teresa without the added burden of keeping the armies of people involved all marching to the same drummer. She needed someone she could really trust to make sure that everything comes off as planned.

After days of agonizing over all of this, Teresa had what I consider to be a true stroke of genius. She would appoint Nita and Jennifer as our official Wedding Slaves. I love this idea! You see, Nita's organizational skills are second to none. Plus, her sense of humor and taste for the bizarre are exactly what we'll need on what could otherwise be the most stressful day of our lives. Jennifer's skills are a perfect complement: She's tough as nails, and could survive a nuclear war without getting her hair mussed. Nothing can fluster her. And, should someone need a little prodding to get the job done, she has the ability to make grown men cower in fear. They're the perfect pair!

Now, we realize that the title of "Wedding Slave" is not nearly as sexy as "Maid of Honor". But in our eyes, there is no higher position of honor than that of Wedding Slave. We were so happy when both Jennifer and Nita agreed to serve in this capacity. We will be forever indebted to them. And, we'll always love our two wonderful Wedding Slaves.

With this decision made, the choice of Maid of Honor was easy. Teresa chose the one person whom she loves above all others - her daughter Tonya Shane. We realize that chosing one's daughter as Maid of Honor is a little out of the ordinary. But, I can't think of anyone I'd rather have standing there on stage as I get married. And, there's no one other than Shane that can put that special twinkle in Teresa's eye. Besides, Shane will be much better at standing around looking pretty than doing anything else that might require organization skills. I predict that at least some portion of our wedding day will be spent assisting Shane in locating her car keys and shoes.

Next, I had to choose a Best Man. I wish my late father could be there standing by my side. He'll always be the "best man" in my eyes. I'd also be honored to have either of my brothers as Best Man. But choosing between them would be impossible. So, I decided to look to my friends.

I guess I don't really have a "best" friend. Through some lucky twist of fate, I've been surrounded by more than my fair share of close friends, any one of whom would make an excellent Best Man. I considered each of my business partners. They're all great guys who entertain me to no end, and for whom I have a great deal of respect. I thought about my fishing buddy, Rob Rierson. I've always felt some kind of special, hard-to-describe connection with Rob. And, there's just something about having him around that seems to calm me down - a great trait for a potential Best Man. I thought about Nita's husband Tom. We've been friends for almost 15 years, and he's got a great way of getting people to do what they're supposed to do with making anyone mad - another great trait for a Best Man. I thought about Teresa's brother Steve, with whom I've become very good friends. I thought about her uncle Paul , even though getting him into a tuxedo would have been next to impossible. Well, you get the picture - I did an awful lot of thinking. But, I had to quit screwing around and make a decision.

In the end, the choice was clear. I asked George Bitar to be my Best Man. Over the past few years, I've probably spent more time with George than with any other friend - even my own brothers. George is talented, funny, exceptionally bright, patient, considerate, and more than a little wierd - all qualities I greatly admire. Plus, he's strong, and can carry me to the stage should I pass out from fright.

Having chosen our Wedding Slaves, Maid of Honor, and Best Man, selecting the balance of our wedding party was pretty easy. We wanted someone from each of our families to participate in the wedding. So, we asked Teresa's brother Steve to give the bride away, and act as usher. He cleans up real good for a country boy. We also asked my nephew Nick to serve as ring bearer. He's so cute that I expect an audible "Ohhhh...." as he walks down the aisle. And, we felt like we really should have at least one Richter in the wedding. So, Tom and Nita's daughter Jordan will serve as Flower Girl. She's always brimming with confidence, and is a veteran of past weddings. Also helping us out will be our neice Ashley Lee, and George's son Max, acting as Registrars.

And so it is. The most difficult of our wedding decisions has been made.

We hated to leave out so many of our dear friends. You guys please don't be offended. Instead, be releived. At least you'll likely be out of projectile vomit range should I be unable to control my nervous stomach as I say "I do".

And Shane, please don't forget your shoes.

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